Within days of returning home from Portugal, I found lettuce seeds from last summer. I felt the need to plant them, to see something new grow. I put the little seeds in a pot inside my sunny kitchen, watered them and waited. Today a few weeks later, they are out of the ground. Slowly growing, coming to life. Seeing them transform, getting a little taller and stronger every day makes me happy.
In my 30’s I had periods where I felt incredibly stuck. Whether it was in jobs, relationships, the day-to-day, my health, my goals, my yoga practice, etc, etc. All of these internal ups and downs. In January 2020 I was 40 years old and felt overwhelmed, unfulfilled and a little broken. I finished back-to-back meetings and couldn’t breath. I called a dear friend to come into my office because I was frozen. Then I balled my eyes out. I told her I couldn’t do this anymore. This happened over three years ago and I remember it like it was yesterday. The feelings of helplessness I had and the weeks (months, years) leading to this breaking point. Recognizing something needed to change. I was unhappy and it was affecting my life.
I began formulating a plan, with my usual tight grip of control over it. There were some things that needed to change for sure. Yet, I was too afraid to flip my life around too much. I loved a steady paycheck and financial security. I loved having (or saying I had) a successful career and great title. I needed to be cautious, safe. My mind (and tears) were screaming to do something, to get unstuck. Still I didn’t want to be too bold. I thought I’ll take a few months break, travel a bit, then go back to my corporate career in marketing. Return to the stability and recognition I craved. A risk, but not too big because that was scary.
The universe is funny though and had other plans for me. March 2020 hit and I couldn’t leave the country. Talk about feeling even more stuck! Then I learned my job was ending in October. There goes the coveted paycheck. So I started to plant new seeds. I let new ideas come into focus, new possibilities. I kept replanting and replanting. Some seeds never grew and some are still taking shape. I reconnected to my core values. I didn’t give up. A lot of reframing needed to happen and a lot of getting uncomfortable with the unknown. All pieces of my own “gardening” story.
Planting seeds is about new possibilities. Seeing something transform from a tiny speck that with time and care becomes alive and beautiful. My journey is unique to me. I constantly replant and weed things out. You have your own story to plant. What does your ideal life garden look like?
Get clear on what you want to grow, what changes you want to make
Acknowledge external obstacles and internal limiting beliefs plus ways to ensure they don’t impede growth
Start small and be intentional with what you want to happen
Water your seeds with consistency, patience and self love
Celebrate your harvest, the small and big accomplishments
Gardening takes resilience. Have you tried something new and given up because results didn’t come immediately? I know I have! Or gotten derailed from your goals because things went in a different direction than the plan? Welcome to life!
When I planted my lettuce seeds a few weeks ago, I knew some would never rise from the dirt. Some would sprout then wilt. Still most are flourishing in the sunshine, as long as I keep watering them. Our intentions for growth, change and action are the same. I continually tell myself to keep planting and nurturing because many things take time to bloom.
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